


He Felt the Weight of the World on His Shoulders

by orphan_account



Series: You're Just as Heartless as Me [1]
Category: The Maze Runner Series - James Dashner
Genre: Hurt and comfort, M/M, mentions of past suicide attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-04
Updated: 2015-12-04
Packaged: 2018-05-04 23:26:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,042
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5352311
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Minho jogged towards the Homestead immediately after getting back from the Maze, as he had everyday since it happened. He waved off Alby and Frypan's calls of hello and continued on to his destination. There had been a cold, emptiness about the Maze ever since Newt's accident and there was just something off about it. Minho couldn't put his finger on it, but it seemed as though it just didn't make sense. Almost as though Newt had been lying but Minho didn't want to believe that could be true. Newt didn't lie, he was too much of a sucker for order to go around spreading mistruths.</p>
            </blockquote>





	He Felt the Weight of the World on His Shoulders

Minho jogged towards the Homestead immediately after getting back from the Maze, as he had everyday since _it_ happened. He waved off Alby and Frypan's calls of hello and continued on to his destination. There had been a cold, emptiness about the Maze ever since Newt's accident and there was just something off about it. Minho couldn't put his finger on it, but it seemed as though it just didn't make sense. Almost as though Newt had been lying but Minho didn't want to believe that could be true. Newt didn't lie, he was too much of a sucker for order to go around spreading mistruths.

The Homestead was empty and eerily quiet when he entered but he supposed it wasn't much of a surprise. Most people would be off getting dinner from Frypan, not sitting around the dusty old place. He rounded the corner to where he knew that Newt was staying and was hit by a wave of confusion when he noticed that the room was empty. He knew that Newt wouldn't have gone down with the others to dinner, he could barely walk. His leg had proven to be a huge problem, and they all knew it wasn't going to be the same again. Minho supposed he should look into replacing Newt with a new Runner but thought gave him such a nasty feeling in his stomach that he couldn't hold the thought in his brain for longer than a few seconds. He couldn't imagine Newt not being a Runner, it didn't seem right.

Minho looked around the room and noticed the figure of Newt laying on the floor. He sprinted over to him, despite being exhausted from running through the Maze all day, and knelt down beside the boy. Newt's eyes flicked over to him and the slightest of a smile slid across his face before disappearing.

"What happened, Newt?" Minho asked, his voice ragged. "Did you fall?"

"No." Newt replied simply. "I like the floor. I feel closer to where I belong."

Minho blinked, not entirely sure what Newt was getting at. "What?"

Newt glanced back up towards the ceiling and let out a sigh. His head was resting down against the back of his wrists and he seemed more at peace then he had since long before the accident. Minho watched him stare calmly at the ceiling and wondered what possibly could be going through his head right now. Newt had always been slightly difficult to read but lately it was as though it was pointless to try. "I feel closer to the ground when I'm down here. Because I've hit rock bottom."

"What? Newt, no." Minho shook his head, his legs starting to sting from crouching but he didn't dare move. "You haven't. That's not true, don't worry about it. Your leg will get better and you'll be okay."

"I jumped."

The words hit Minho's ears but didn't seem to register. He blinked once, twice, three times before shaking his head. Was Newt implying what it sounded like he was implying? Minho didn't want to believe it so he merely replied with "What?"

Newt looked back at him, that same small smile on his face. "I jumped off the wall, Minho."

"Why would you do that?" Minho replied, laughing slightly. It wasn't funny at all but he didn't know how else to react to something like this. What else was he supposed to say? What Newt was saying was impossible… absolutely not possible. Because Newt would never jump off the Maze wall, he would never.

Newt laughed. "Why would anybody do something like that, Min? I was trying to bloody kill myself."

Minho let out a strangled gasp and felt very much as though he'd been stabbed in the stomach. Newt had tried to kill himself. Newt was so miserable, hated himself so much, that he thought death was the best option. "Newt… why?"

Newt didn't answer, staring up at the ceiling again. The small smile was gone and his face was dark again. Back to the darkness that had come over him ever since the accident. Or maybe it wasn't an accident, but that thought made Minho want to throw up. Newt…

"Alby said that even if my leg wasn't totally buggered he wouldn't let me go back into the Maze." Newt sighed.

Minho shook his head, the words sounding like a completely different language. This was new, this wasn't something Minho was used to or had prepared himself for. Newt had always seemed so strong, something to look up to or inspired to be like but now Minho knew he was just as damaged as all the other boys here. And now he had a physical reminder of just how bad it could it get.

"Alby knows what you did?" Minho said with the slightest voice crack while playing with his fingers. Picking at the dead skin around his nails. He didn't know what else to say.

"Why do you think he came for me?" Newt snapped, then laughed again with a shake of the head. "Not my point, Minho. You've got to replace me. Can't be short a Runner, and I don't know why you haven't already."

Minho coughed and then moved so he was laying down beside Newt. Newt's eyes flickered over to him, confusion crossing his face slightly before going back to the steady stare of stone. "I'll replace you as a Runner but I could never replace you as my best friend, Newt."

"Minho…." Newt said, voice more angry than sad. He didn't want to hear it. "Alby already gave me the speech about how important I am and told me that if I ever act like anything less he'll throw me in the Slammer until my head is on right again, so spare me."

"I wasn't going to give a speech." Minho snapped, pinching the brim of his nose. "Just going to say that you're a stupid shank but you're _my_ stupid shank and I don't want you going anywhere!"

Newt was quietly for a long moment before grumpily replying "Thanks."

Minho huffed out an irritated laugh. "You're welcome. Shank."

And if Newt took hold of Minho's hand after that, well, that was just the way things were.


End file.
